Sunday, December 21, 2008


We have attended at least one Pinoy Christmas party every weekend for the last 3 weeks. SN1 makes us go to these parties because, well since we (Ma and I) have no lives here, we get to live hers too.

She means well. This is not one of her spur-of-the-moment outings that benefit only her. There is nothing else to do at home anyway, and the weekends are the only time we get to go out. But, I guess, what SN1 doesn't realize is (and this is, by no means, her fault at all) that I do not do well in unfamiliar social functions. Read: "If it's not a party with my firends, I don't enjoy it."

The party tonight was extra painful. It was a party for the local SFC (Singles for Christ) members. And if there are 2 things I do not talk to strangers about, it's my personal life and religion. Especially if Ma is there (
Cabin Fever to the Infinite Power for reference).

There was this one girl in particular who decided to adopt me as a charity case. As soon as she found out from SN1 and Ma that I was in my 30's, single and not dating, she zeroed in on me to talk about not losing hope. GAG!

How can she just walk up to me and immediately assume that I was losing hope? What, if any, kind of sign did I send off in the 10 minutes that she's known me to say that I needed a pep talk about the current status of my personal life? And why would she think that she had any authority to talk to me about it? I don't even listen to my friends!

She, on the other hand, starts talking about her ex-boyfriend; that they broke up almost a year ago; that he is now engaged; that he sent her a text message just last week; that she thinks he's a loser; that she's grateful they didn't end up together; that she is now asking God for a sign; and that she has a list of what she wanted from Him. All that in 5 minutes!

I so wanted to walk out on her, but I did not want to embarrass either of us. I thought I was saved when our hostess' father joined our conversation (if you can call it that). But he started talking about (drum roll please)... religion. Oooooooooooooooh no. This was going to be a long night.

I was lodged between them -- the obsessive Single for Christ and the stubbornly opinionated hostess' father -- for a good part of an hour before I could think of an excuse to get up and leave. Some guests arrived -- with booze! Aaaaaah....salvation. From that moment on, I held on to my paper cup like a drowning person held on to a log. I did not put it down. I nursed each drink. I drank constantly so I didn't have to talk to anybody.

To entertain myself, I sat down in front of the TV (which was on mute) and tried to understand the dialogue by reading the actors' lips. It was very challenging. There was maybe 30 minutes left to the movie when they turned the TV off to play games. During this time, I amused myself with BIL's iTouch. I updated my
facebook and friendster accounts, checked my email, looked at some pictures, music, videos, finished half a bottle of wine, stayed in the toilet until someone else had to use it.

It was no one's fault this time that I did not enjoy the party. SFC girl certainly tried her best to make me feel welcome -- a little too much, though. The rest of them invited me to join the games, but I declined. I just wasn't comfortable around these people. We had nothing in common. We had nothing to talk about. I was the only outsider in the group, and I had no clue who or what they were talking about. And I didn't care anyway.

I have always had a fairly small circle of friends, and lately I haven't been very good at making new ones. These friends that I have are the same people I go out of my way to see whenever I'm home. These are the people I can bare my heart and soul to. With these people I have no problems talking about religion or politics, even if they are my least favorite subjects. Because with these people I can be funny. I can be honest. I can be sarcastic. I can be rude. I can be crass. I can be myself.

I miss you people!

3 side-notes:

Anonymous said...

*sigh* can totally relate. merry christmas ling! - agay

LingBling said...

are you going to RnR this friday? if you are greet everyone a merry christmas for me. sniff sniff

vanilla said...